Are you having trouble keeping hope alive right now?
Especially as we all witness or live through the gut-wrenching effects of wildfires, hurricanes, earthquakes, war and genocide, and political turmoil around the world.
I’ve been thinking about hope a lot lately as I face the unspeakable heartbreak of slowly losing both my parents to the disease of dementia and as I connect with people navigating all kinds of significant transitions.
Not the casual kind of hope we toss around like confetti – “I hope it doesn’t rain tomorrow” or “I hope the traffic isn’t bad.”
I’m thinking about the deep, soul-sustaining hope that carries us through life’s darkest valleys and helps us believe in dawns we can’t yet see.
Whether caring for needy loved ones, adjusting to an empty nest, reimagining our purpose, facing health challenges, or simply questioning what’s next, keeping hope alive becomes crucial in these threshold moments of our lives.
The Anatomy of Hope
In its truest form, hope isn’t just optimistic thinking or positive affirmations. It’s more like an anchor, steadying us when life’s waters get choppy.
Hope is the quiet voice that whispers “not yet” when our weary hearts want to give up. It’s the gentle hand at our back, encouraging us to take one more step even when we can’t see where the path leads.
I’m learning that hope isn’t something we have or don’t have. It’s a practice we can cultivate, like tending a garden. And just as a garden needs different care in different seasons, our hope requires nurturing in unique ways during life’s most challenging times.
I believe hope has three essential elements: desire for something better, belief in possibility, and the courage to take action.
It’s not just wishing things were different; wishing is passive. Hope allows us to envision a better future while staying grounded in the present moment and taking action to pursue that future.
When Life Feels Heavy, How Do We Keep Hope Alive?
Here are some practices I’ve found helpful, and I invite you to explore them:
Return to Stillness
I have an early morning ritual of watching birds in my garden sanctuary. Like me, you can create small pockets of quiet in your day. Hope often speaks in whispers, and we need stillness to hear it.
Connect with Something Larger Than Yourself
Whether through prayer, meditation, time in nature, or service to others, connecting with something bigger than our immediate circumstances can reignite our sense of possibility. A long, silent walk in the wilderness does this for me. Tuning into the intricate web of life surrounding me reconnects me to something ancient and eternal, both within and without.
Remember Your Story
You’ve weathered storms before. Take time to reflect on past challenges you’ve overcome. Let those memories remind you of your resilience. One of my favorite quotes by Eleanor Roosevelt illustrates this: “You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’”
Practice Presence and Notice Joy
Hope isn’t just about the future – it’s also about fully inhabiting this moment. Notice the small, joyful gifts each day brings. Some of my favorites are hearing birdsong in the early morning, a mug of hot tea, laughing with my husband, connecting with a friend, a good book, my cozy bed, popcorn, and dark chocolate. (I confess those last four have been known to happen simultaneously.)
Surround Yourself with Hope Carriers
Some people naturally strengthen our hope, while others deplete it. Choose your company wisely, especially during challenging times. I am grateful to have a small circle of women friends who always hold out hope for me, even when circumstances seem impossible to bear.
Chan Hellman, PhD, professor, author, and director of The Hope Research Center at the University of Oklahoma, teaches that hope is a social gift – it doesn’t happen in isolation. Our connectedness with each other is the single best predictor of hope.
As Hellman states, “At the heart of change is our ability to understand the way things are right now in our lives, and that we can begin to imagine the way things could be. This is where hope is born.”
The Wisdom of Hard Times
Now that I’m in the second half of my life, I understand that life isn’t straightforward. I’ve learned that joy and sorrow often travel together and that some of my most profound growth has come through my most significant challenges.
This wisdom allows me to hold hope differently than I did in my younger years. I’ve learned to embrace a more nuanced hope that doesn’t deny difficulty but chooses to believe in possibility anyway. One that knows darkness and light are both part of the journey.
Sometimes, hope looks different than we expect. It might not be the bright, bubbly feeling we associate with optimism. Instead, it might be the quiet determination to put one foot in front of the other. It might be the courage to rest when we need to, trusting that rest itself is part of moving forward.
For some of us, hope intertwines with purpose. It beckons us toward new possibilities as we release old roles and expectations. It invites us to ask: What do I truly love? How can I make a difference? What wants to emerge through me in this chapter of life?
I’ve learned that hope isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about staying open to possibility, even amid uncertainty. It’s about trusting that our story isn’t over yet and that beautiful chapters are still waiting to be written.
Our hope matters – it spreads to everyone around us, like passing a flame from one candle to another. When everything seems dark, choosing hope is a bold move that shows real courage and love.
So today, I invite you to rekindle your hope. Not the superficial kind but the deep, anchoring hope that reminds us of who we are and what we’re capable of. Let it be your companion as you navigate this complex season of life.
Also read, The Joyful Living Toolkit: 10 Transformative Practices
Let’s Start a Conversation:
What’s one small practice that helps you maintain hope during challenging times? Can you recall a difficult period in your life where hope carried you through? Who are the “hope carriers” in your life? How do they help you maintain perspective during tough times?
